It seems that many of us have preconceived notions about what constitutes love or a loving act. These notions are often formed based on how we were raised, our religious upbringing, and our environment. Some of us fantasize love while others are eternal cynics. But ultimately, doesn’t love look exactly how you say it does?
I used to be uncomfortable with male attention. Of course, now I understand that this discomfort had alot to do with the abuse I suffered, but I’m noticing more and more women also have this same discomfort. If a man admires their shape too long, their clothes, their hair, or, heaven forbid, he inquires into their marital status, they automatically start a verbal war in their heads. They get defensive and sometimes downright rude. And okay, some will graciously take the compliments and keep it moving, but often times they later complain, asking why it couldn’t have been someone else offering up the compliments or stares. Someone better looking, dressed nicer, nicer eyes, blah, blah, blah.
I recite a quote to my students almost daily. I can’t remember who said it or in what book I read it, but it is appropriate for this particular situation. “How you do anything, is how you do everything.” If anyone remembers who said this please leave a comment so that I can give the author credit. Regardless of the author, that is exactly what I want to say to these women. While they’re “waiting” on the one (who does not exist, I might add), they aren’t celebrating those in front of them. Every person who comes into our space is our opportunity to practice. It is our opportunity to show God, the Universe, ourselves, exactly how we will treat “the one”. Show up! If we can’t be gracious, loving, accepting of compliments, and respectful to strangers or others in our space, then how on Earth will the one ever have the green light to show up?
So what does love like? It looks exactly how you say and believe it does. If you don’t believe you can love more than one person then you won’t. If you don’t believe that a man can give you compliments because he truly loves women then he won’t. If you don’t love yourself enough to think you’re worthy of compliments from ANYONE then you have a while before “the one” will show up. Personally, I choose to believe that love is in everything. My lens sees only love. And amazingly, I attract some of the most amazing, spectacular people and experiences. I celebrate all interactions. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I don’t celebrate until after the experience is over, but I make sure to celebrate. Because I truly believe that, “how do anything, is how you do everything.” And I do everything in love. *smooches*