“How you do anything is how you do everything.” I’ve posted the quote before and absolutely swear by it. It’s just so doggone true! I don’t know how many times I’ve heard women and men complain about not being able to find an appropriate mate. A couple of weeks ago, I was in the steam room at my gym when a nice gentleman and I began a conversation about dating here in Atlanta. His major complaint was that there were plenty of women here in Atlanta, but not enough quality women. The whole quantity over quality reality that get Atlanta men every time.
And while I have a issue with some of his complaints, they were actually kinda wack, I do agree that there is a glaring deficit of quality women here in Atlanta. And I can imagine this is true in most urban areas.
I think we’ve complained too much about men and what they’re NOT bringing to the table without focusing on our own stuff and what WE’RE bringing to relationships. Honestly, we’re so focused on finding someone to love, that somewhere along the way we’ve forgotten to love ourselves. We’re walking around angry, bitter, resentful, and paranoid. We’re overworked, undernourished, stressed and tired. Yet, we expect someone to love us through all of this mess. Now, don’t get me wrong – miracles happen everyday. Lol. However, instead of waiting for a miracle, let’s be a bit more proactive in drawing love to us. And the way to draw the love that we want is to become more loving.
It’s hard at first. It’s a foreign concept that many of us haven’t been taught or even witnessed. However, in order for us to know what love is, what it feels like, and what it looks like, we have to begin with practicing loving ourselves. Choose to be more loving in your speech and in your actions. Choose to react lovingly in diffcult or challenging situations. Yes! It is tough. We often allow our ego to dictate our reactions. We think we’re being soft or used or we’re allowing someone to get away with something. But all of that is unimportant when it comes to love and it’s great preparation for the sacred relationship that many of us desire. Ego has no place in love. Once we start to practice walking in love in all things and in all situations, ego slowly begins to dissipate. And it feels so damn good!
And most importantly, don’t go without anything because you’re waiting for The One to come and do it for you, to you *wink*, or with you. Take the trips you want to take, pamper yourself in every way that you’ve ever desired, ladies wear your lingerie whether you’re in a relationship or not, and go out to restaurants alone. If you can’t stand being alone with you, how can you expect someone else to? Focus on ways to show yourself just how much you love yourself. Be in love with you!
And before you know it, you’re honey and loving opportunites swarm around you like bees. *giggle* Believe me…I know. *smooches*